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I’ll Keep That One in Mind

I HAVE always been a seller, not a buyer, so it is hard for me to understand the thought process of the after-Christmas shopper. That is not altogether true; as a merchant I have obviously done a lot of both – but the selling is the tough part of the act. And now, when most everything is on sale at the end of the season, is the time that it takes the greatest effort.

I really think there is a book of instructions included with every Christmas tree, “A short course in how to drive the merchants mad” might be the title. Happily, the book is usually discarded by the end of January. Here is a typical dialogue.

“Good afternoon,” says the salesman.

“I’m just looking,” is the quick reply.

“What can I show you? The sport coats in your size are over here.”

“Oh, I’m just trying to find one I like.”

“But there are far more to choose from in your size 44 long than these 38 shorts.”

“I don’t want a sport coat anyway, where are your suits?”

“Right this way, did you have something in particular in mind?”

“Yes, a dark gray pinstripe, single breasted at around $300.”

“Let me show you these,” says our most talented salesman. “There are five or six to choose from, at the price you mentioned, and all of them are greatly reduced.”

“I will need the suit next week. It’s for a business trip.”

“We’re very busy right now, but for you we can do it,” replies the salesman.

“Which one do you like best?”

“Oh, this one will be fine.”

“Good, I’ll call the tailor for a fitting.”

“Don’t do that – I’m only looking, and I’ll keep that one in mind! Where are your sport coats?”

Of This & That

We are saddened by the decision of our fellow amateur journalist, Walt Brovald, to suspend publication of The Gryphon. We will miss those bums sitting on the tailgate of the old moving van. Write him a card, perhaps he’ll change his mind.

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Handset in Caslon 337, and letterpress printed monthly – just for the fun of it – by

Robert Orbach
Oklahoma City, Ok. 73118

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