editoradmin
It took a whole month to arrive,
This is The Alexander Rag, Number 5
Printed on canary yellow paper
You will read of Fatman’s caper.
A super chicken and other things,
All of which you’ll note, have wings.
Don’t show this issue to your cat
Because it has become obvious that
Even though it doesn’t chirp or coo,
This Rag isn’t for me or you.
There’s no more use in wasting words;
This month’s issue is for the birds!
The New, Incredibly Exciting Adventures of FATMAN
The phone rings in the office of that world famous crime fighter, that world renowned super hero, the one person who strikes fear into the hearts of any would be law violator – the one, the only FATMAN!!
“Hello, Fatman? This is King Fud. There is a giant chicken terrorizing the kingdom. Can you help?”
“Of course, Fud.” answers our hero. He goes immediately to the Fat Cove and enters the Fat Tube. After a smooth countdown and take off from the Fat Tube… KA-BOOM!
YEEEE EEEOOOW! He streaks through the sky to the scene of the chicken.
CLUCK
Needless to say, Fatman disposes of the chicken in quick fashion…
BONK CRUNCH BOP! BAM! SMASH! POW
And there is enough chicken to feed the entire kingdom for a month.
HOORAY FOR FATMAN!
Inky Dinks
A Treasury of Useless Information
There are about 8600 species of living birds and approximately thirty thousand varieties.
Ostriches attain the height of about 8 feet. They can run as fast as 25 MPH.
Inky Dinks may become a regular feature of The Alexander Rag.
A Minor Bird
by Robert Frost
I have wished a bird would fly away.
And not sing by my house all day;
Have clapped my hands at him from the door
When it seemed as if I could bear no more.
The fault must partly have been in me.
The bird was not to blame for his key.
And of course there must be something wrong
In wanting to silence any song.
The Secret
Anonymous
We have a secret, just we three
The robin and I,
And the sweet cherry tree;
The bird told the tree,
And the tree told me,
And nobody knows it
But just us three.
But of course the robin
Knows it best,
Because he built the –
I shan’t tell the rest;
And laid the four little –
Something in it –
I’m afraid I shall tell it
Every minute.
But if the tree and robin
Don’t peep,
I’ll try my best
The secret to keep;
Though I know
When the little birds fly about
Then the whole secret will be out.
Here are the right hands I promised to print. Cut them out and glue them to the back of the Rag No. 3.
If there is any interest shown in Fatman, I might have future adventures. I would probably go to a partially offset journal, so I could draw the cartoon myself and give Fatman a little life.
What Are These Things?
The nest of blue bellied meadow screecher and a meadow screecher shooter? Any other ideas?
The Alexander Rag
Number 5
Published by
Gary Woodie
St. Francis, Wisconsin 53207